Expect Expectations

I have been blessed with parents who have motivated and challenged me to be the best I can be. The best part is, what I knew they expected was hard but it wasn't impossible. They knew what I could do and challenged me to do better. For example, my parents challenged me to get good grades. They knew I could get 'B's so that was what they expected. But they help me and challenged me to get even better grades. My dad even made a deal with me that if I got honor roll he would buy me a Nintendo 64 (that was the big thing when I was a kid). I would try and try and honestly I didn't get it for a long time. It wasn't until my 8th grade year that I finally, and after a lot of hard work made honor roll. My parents knew I could do it. They didn't just expect it from me, they challenged me, pushed me, and even helped me.

Here's another example. My dad didn't expect me to do anything that he couldn't do, so when I was in Boy Scouts, he didn't expect me to get Eagle Scout because he didn't get to the rank of Eagle. He wanted me to, but he didn't expect me to. When I got to rank of 1st Class my parents sat me down and said, "OK, now things are going to get harder. Do you want to keep going for Eagle or do you want to stop here." When I said that I wanted to keep going their response was, "OK, we'll help you and push you to get there." With me wanting to go on, they now expected me to get Eagle. And days before my 18th birthday, when you are no longer a scout, I earned my Eagle Scout rank.

My mom always said, "It takes a little bit to be above average." Her expectation of me was to be above average. As far as I know, I have not let her or her expectation down. She is very proud of me, and tells me all the time. As I said, I know that I am blessed. The reality is every parent has expectations of their children. They generally wants what's best for them. For some parents this means pushing their children to live up to their expectations even if they are high and unrealistic. Some parents seem to expect perfection and don't settle for anything less. They think they know what's best, so they push their children to be the best, sometimes to the point of exhaustion. I don't think some parents really realize just what kind of pressure they are putting on their children.

So, the questions remain, how do deal with our parents expectations of us? How do we even find out what our parents really expect of us? Join us tomorrow night at Crash as we continue our series of Teens Vs. Parents. We'll be looking at how people try to live up to the expectations of their parents, how they deal when they can't and what we can do about our own parent's expectations. I hope to see you tomorrow night.